David@60 – My Mini Life Map

I just turned sixty.  After reflecting on my last six decades and envisioning what my seventh decade might look like, I decided to create a mini life map* to tell the story with a few short words and pictures. I titled each decade just like a book chapter with the one or two words that defined the period for me. I then added highlight bullets, emotion words, thinking words, and a summary statement for each decade. Finally, I picked out two or three photos that represented the decade for me. This was a fun and meaningful exercise.  I’m looking forward to what the next ten-year chapter in my life will bring.

Decade 1 – 1956-1965    FIFTH CITY

• Germany #1 as preschooler
• The Order – started in Evanston and then moved to West Side of Chicago
• “Fifth City” Urban Development Project – 16-square-block area near Homan Avenue “L” station
• The Ecumenical Institute
• Iron Boy (becoming an Iron Man)
• Leif Ericson Elementary School
• Two Fires (Evanston, my parents’ bedroom)
• The Brotherhood (John, Mark, Wayne, David)

Feeling: Anger, Fear, Crying, Excited, Crazy, Nightmares

Thinking: Hot and cold – I love laying down my life for the mission, I hate it, no, I love it. No, wait….

Statement: The Order and the West Side ghetto of Chicago took me to the edge, but the Brotherhood helped me survive.

Decade 2 – 1966-1975    FREEDOM

• Third Fire (Chicago riots after MLK killing)
• Leaving Home at Twelve
• Iowa in Seventh Grade
• Malaysia in Ninth Grade
• Denver in Tenth Grade
• San Jose, CA in Eleventh and Twelfth Grade
• The Other World
• The Institute of Cultural Affairs
• “Christ Event” in San Jose, CA
• Left Order
• San Francisco State University (majored in International Relations & German Literature)
• Fourth Fire (Wayne’s apartment house arson)
• Germany #2 – Heidelberg University (junior year abroad)

Feeling: Homesick, Anger, Apathy, Remorse, Lonely, Awe, Exhilaration, Relief, Burning

Thinking: I grew up fast, maybe too fast. I’m lucid but I don’t fit in with non-Order youth.

Statement: In RS-1 language, I had my own Tillich Christ Event at seventeen and awakened to my own profound Bonhoeffer freedom, but it took a near-violent episode to shake me to the core.

Decade 3 – 1976-1985    KATE

• SFSU Graduation
• Selling Apple II computers San Francisco financial district with Mark
• Chase Manhattan Bank in New York City
• Kindred Spirit Kate on Wall Street
• Mexico City – Kate & David in penthouse
• Atlanta – Starting software career at Peachtree Software, Mark & Julian
• Our wedding in western Massachusetts
• Boston – Harvard Business School, David L.

Feeling: Loving Soul Mate, Confident, Adventuresome, Taking (more than giving)

Thinking: I’ll make a difference by becoming a minister like my dad and granddad; no, I’ll work for non-profits and the World Bank to change the world; no, I’ll help the world by redistributing the wealth via commercial banking; no, I’ll bring voice to the masses through the microcomputer software revolution. Profoundly appreciative of my short Chase bank tenure since it brought Kate into my life-and changed everything.

Statement: My life changed for the better when I met Kate. I’m the luckiest guy I know.

Decade 4 – 1986-1995    EMILY & BEN

• Emily born in Boston, Massachusetts
• HBS graduation, Class of 1987
• Germany #3 – Munich with Softlab, Klaus
• Thinking, feeling, dreaming in two languages: German & English
• Ben born in Munich, Germany
• Moved to San Francisco with Softlab GmbH/BMW AG
• JourneyWare Media, Mark & David L.
• Joined Men’s Group
• Kate and David’s 10^th Anniversary
• “I Want You to Know, Before I Go” (precursor to The Book of Myself)

Feeling: Loving children; not worthy of HBS, but wait, maybe I am; ready to take risks; stressed at running own company with constant fund raising and cash constraint; safe with my men’s group

Thinking: Meeting the Mystery of Life in infant faces of Emily and Ben; entrepreneurial spirit

Statement: Co-creating, helping birth, and raising two children is the most awe-filled experience of my life.

Decade 5 – 1996-2005    MARSHALL BOOKS

• Settling in Northern California
• The Book of Myself published (becomes bestseller)
• The Book of Us published (becomes bestseller)
• Oracle Corporation, Preet and Mark
• Homestore, weekly commute to Los Angeles, Preet
• The Book of My Pet published (first dud)
• Kabira Software in San Rafael, CA, Mark and Preet
• Go-go high tech investing and crashing back to earth
• Emily leaving the nest
• Kate and David’s 20^th anniversary
• Men’s Group 10^th anniversary
• Leaving software business at 50

Feeling: After many travels, California feels like home; thrilled to be an “author;” relief with Oracle paycheck; exciting Homestore IPO; exhausting battles at Homestore and Kabira; burned out.

Thinking: Book of Myself proves I can work for myself; I’m an investment genius, oh wait, maybe I’m not. It’s time to move on, start over, and reinvent myself.

Statement: As software storms raged, I found my calling and ability to make a difference in Marshall Books.

Decade 6 – 2006-2015    WORK REIMAGINED

• Writing Iron Boy memoir
  
• Berrett-Koehler Publishers – second (or third) career, finding true community
• Ben leaving the nest
• What I Love About You (becomes bestseller)
• Emily’s Wesleyan graduation
• Ben’s UCLA graduation
• Emily’s University of Minnesota Law School graduation
• The Book of Myself – second edition published
• Picture of Me published
• My Life Map published
• What I Love About You, Mom published
  
• Kate and David’s 30^th anniversary
• Men’s Group 20^th anniversary

Feeling: happy, content, invigorated, creative, innovative, compassionate, learning to breathe

Thinking: I’m wearing two hats, one as an author, the other as a publisher, both with a mission to make the world a better place; giving back.

Statement: I’m extending my vocational calling, started with Marshall Books, by working for Berrett-Koehler Publishers.

Decade 7 – 2016-2025    SPIRITUAL SYNTHESIS

• Studying Buddhism
• Studying Christianity
• I Loved You First – published in 2017
• Complete and publish Iron Boy
• Rediscovering music and singing
• Yoga, Qi Gong, Tai Chi
• Aging well
• “Refire Don’t Retire”
  
• Kate and David’s 40^th anniversary
• Men’s Group 30^th anniversary
• Discovering the world; embracing global cultures
• Planting my activist stake: protecting Mother Earth (or something else)
•  Passing of parents – helping them exit with grace and dignity
• Making a difference in grandchildrens’ lives

Feeling: peaceful, serene, contemplative, yearning, concerned, giving, body creaking

Thinking: What a gift to be healthy in mind, body, and spirit as I start my seventh decade; it gives me an opportunity to integrate the lessons of my first six decades and to help others with what I’ve gathered.

Statement: Synthesizing my spirit life toward enlightenment; discovering and nurturing my higher self in service of others.

*If you want to do something simple like this for a meaningful milestone in your life, just follow this same formula I used. If you want a more comprehensive version with warm up activities to lead you through the life mapping process for your past, present and future, I recommend My Life Map: A Journal to Help You Shape Your Future, which I co-wrote with my wife Kate.

David Marshall, February 2016