In fourth grade I began developing breasts at seemingly lightning speed. I legitimately worried my breasts would grow so huge that one day, whilst walking the busy halls of my middle school, I would lose my balance and tumble forward, my books and my hopes of ever being cool simultaneously crashing down around me. (Thankfully, this did not happen. I never did, however, achieve my goal of being a cool middle schooler.) Going from flat chested to curvy, on top of being taller than almost all of the other girls, made me feel deeply, profoundly uncomfortable in my own skin. To hide my body, and to be shorter and smaller than the boys, I began to stand a bit like that creepy, scraggly white-haired guy in The Rocky Horror Picture Show.

Thankfully, years later, I happened upon a two-year acting program in the Sanford Meisner technique, the technique I fell in love with and have spent most of my career teaching. I wasn’t slumping like The Rocky Horror Picture Show guy at this point, but my posture wasn’t stellar. My Meisner class was a posture game changer. Meisner teaches something called “physical adjustments” to help actors create a character.

A person changes something external about herself (body or voice), triggering a radical internal change (inner emotional life).

I soon discovered that the characters I worked on in class with good posture always felt more confident. This happened predictably, no matter the character. Once I figured this out, I decided I wanted to live my life feeling that way and began standing straight not just on stage, but off.

The impact was immediate and staggering. Men did not harass me as much on the streets. I was interrupted less. I was even given more time in auditions! Overall, I was simply treated better and with more respect. My subsequent confidence boost created a wonderful feedback loop. Stand straight, get more respect, work even harder to stand straight consistently. Rinse. Repeat.

I’ve kept up my good posture ever since, and I have no doubt my posture is part of why people tell me I project authority. Now I border on obnoxious when it comes to preaching about better posture. Change your posture, and both your body and self-esteem will thank you. Change your posture, change your life!

Posture isn’t just about your back. It isn’t just about your body. It’s about you—how you feel about yourself and how the world sees you. When I work with clients, I sometimes only need to adjust their posture to radically alter how they are received and, more importantly, how they feel. This is why all aspiring space-claiming women must stand tall!

If you have poor posture, read on to learn tools to improve. If your posture is already good, fantastic! I promise this will up your game.

Let’s start with the facts. Posture impacts us in ways that go far beyond body mechanics. Check out this illustration.¹

The first step to having better posture is to stop behaviors that make your posture worse. There are five main habits that tend to unconsciously diminish your space-claiming capacity. These are movement patterns you probably engage in daily to some extent. Constantly engaging in these patterns has a cumulative effect, and building good habits where you currently have bad ones will result in better overall posture throughout your day. Even I don’t avoid all of them. But you should. Thank you for tolerating my hypocrisy.

Lifting. Don’t bend with your back; bend with your legs. You may feel weird picking up your grocery bags off the ground like a weightlifter, but you will look even weirder hobbling around after throwing out your back.

Traveling. Avoid slouching on long trips. This is hard to do, but slumping for hours on long flights is hard on your body. I suggest standing up and doing stretches in the aisle. People will 100 percent judge you, and you might not be able to pull it off on every flight. If you can’t pull it off in the aisle, just walk to the bathroom a lot, paying particular attention to your posture. You’ll get off that flight in 100 percent better shape than the people laughing about how uncool you are.

Cell phoning. When talking on the phone or texting, hold up your phone; don’t make your head tilt down to your phone.

Working. If you’re like me, you sit or work at your computer until you dehydrate and your back breaks. This is not optimal. Be sure to reset your posture regularly by setting a time to take breaks to stand up and take small walks. This is also a good excuse to network at the water cooler. If you’re working from home, put on your headset and call a friend for a quick catch-up. It can be even easier to fall into a void of sitting for hours and hours in front of your laptop when you’re home. Try not to fall into that trap. Set a timer if you have to, but get up and walk around.

High heeling. Don’t wear high heels. After a night of wearing a great pair of mules, our feet don’t need studies to tell us high heels can be a rare form of torture. And there are studies . . . lots of them. Indeed, I searched for “study high heels and back pain,” and in under a second 368,000,000-plus results popped up. We know wearing very high heels is not the best thing for our posture . . . or our hips, back, knees, or Achilles tendon, for that matter. So don’t wear them. They are bad. Bad, bad, bad!

Here’s the truth: I have an embarrassing number of heels in my closet. The distinctive don’t-mess-with-me click, click, click of a killer pair of stilettos always leaves me feeling fierce, yet all warm and fuzzy inside. And I love my new three-inch, fire-engine-red suede pumps. Delicious. If you are like me and can’t give up your three-inch posture killers, try putting flip-flops in your purse for when you are in transit. Give your feet and your back a bit of a break!

Now you know standing tall is important, and you aren’t slumped over your desk anymore. What’s next? Learn to improve your posture with little time and effort. These simple exercises are easy to do, but don’t expect them to have an immediate effect. Do them regularly, and you will start to improve without even noticing. Your biggest challenge will probably be reading through this next part. I tried to add some spice, but I will admit it’s somewhat technical. Plow through it. You’ll thank yourself later! (Please enjoy the goofy drawings of me demonstrating! You’re welcome.)

The first step to having excellent posture is, surprisingly, lying on the floor! Once you learn this, it will take less than a second to do it.

1. Lie down on a few towels or a thin mat.

2. Bend your knees, with your feet flat.

3. Suck your belly button up and in.

4. Check to see if the muscle on the inside of your pelvic bone is tight.

Practice doing this until you can easily activate your core when you’re lying down. Once you can consistently and quickly activate your core lying down, try it standing up. Eventually you will be able to do this while walking and sitting. For me, sitting is the hardest. The temptation to crumple into any cozy chair is pretty overwhelming!

Once your core is activated, your posture will immediately start improving. When you start to notice this postural shift, it’s time for the next step. It’s a small but critical variation on the traditional shoulder roll.

This takes about one minute, four times a day.

Start by activating your core, and then

1. Pull your shoulders up toward your ears.

2. Pull your shoulders way back without rolling them down at all!

3. Keeping your shoulders back, push them down. (Your chest should feel way too far forward—think Madonna in her cone bra!)

4. Inhale deeply.

5. As you slowly exhale, stop actively pulling your shoulders back.

Where your shoulders land is your neutral position. You’re done!

Do two repetitions four times a day. Be sure to reset during the day when you find yourself backsliding. (Yes, that was a pun.)

If you didn’t find this last exercise difficult, skip to the posture deep dive. If you did find it hard, you may have tight pectoral muscles. The following go-to pec exercise can help.

Many might think they don’t need this. Most probably do. It takes about fifty-five seconds at most.

1. Stand next to a wall.

2. Put your palm on the wall.

3. Slide your hand up the wall.

4. Without bouncing, rotate your torso away from the wall to create a gentle stretch.

5. Do this on both arms.

If you felt a stretch when you did this, be sure to stretch before and after doing “square your shoulders” reps.

And you’re done! You’re a rock star worthy of standing like Captain Marvel that moment after she realized she had some serious powers. Fantastic!

Now, shifting gears, I know I said what you would learn would take just five minutes. If five minutes a day is about all you can devote to posture, I fully get it. What you learned here will suffice. No need to keep reading.

You kept reading! Great! Time for a deeper dive into your posture. The information below will elevate your posture while also globally improving your health. It will take time, but if you kept reading, you already know that it will be well worth it. I promise.

Takes a lot more than five minutes but is so worth it!

Beyond the previous simple exercises, there are several other steps you can take to solidify your new and improved posture. It’s a lot more work, but the payoff is huge. Find the one that sounds most appealing to you and fits with your schedule, and give it a try. There is no one-size-fits-all approach, so you might have to do some trial and error. You’ve found the right one for you when your posture doesn’t just feel better, your body aches less and you feel more confident in your own skin.

The Alexander Technique. The Alexander Technique has made a radical difference for my clients, especially folks with chronic back pain. The Alexander Technique fixes your posture systemically while also improving how your body moves in space. For more information, search online for Alexander Technique, your city, and your state. You can also learn more by searching for American Society for the Alexander Technique. It is well worth the investment! (These teachers must be certified. Don’t work with anyone who isn’t!)

Pilates. Take up this LA favorite and you will have something in common with celebrities like Jamie Lee Curtis, Vanessa Williams, Hugh Grant, Kate Hudson, and Madonna. (I suspect Wonder Woman, Supergirl, Storm, and Jessica Jones probably secretly take Pilates as well, but I have no evidence to prove it.) Many people associate Pilates with the machines and the corresponding price tag for those classes. But Pilates classes done on the floor, “Pilates mat” classes, are actually more challenging and truer to the original method developed by Joseph Pilates. Classes that use machines are useful for rehabilitation (their original purpose!) and for isolating small muscles. But classes on a mat cost the same as a yoga class, are more challenging, and will do just as much or more for your posture.

Several of my clients with chronic back pain have become pain free after committing to regular Pilates classes. Pilates strengthens your core muscles, helps you become mindful of good spinal alignment, and improves your flexibility. To find a good Pilates instructor, I recommend not going online. The quality of instruction can vary, and word of mouth is a lot more reliable than the internet. Pilates also helps with balance, which will allow you to move like Okoye in Black Panther during that incredible fight scene in the casino where she gives new meaning to claiming space. (OK, maybe you won’t be just like her, as you haven’t trained for years in Wakanda, but your balance will markedly improve.)

Weight lifting. Hands down, this is my favorite. I weight train every other day, and I can’t live without it! More importantly, weight lifting most predictably turns my clients’ posture around while making them generally feel fiercer. Standing tall is easier when you’re stronger, and lifting makes you strong! Some women are afraid of lifting weights, fearing it’s going to make them look too “bulky.” If you share this fear, get a personal trainer and let them know you want to get stronger, not bigger. It’s best to have a trainer, but it’s expensive. If you can’t afford a personal trainer, just look for instructional videos online. There are countless videos on how to lift without bulking up. Ease in slowly and carefully using a reputable guide online, but please do give weight lifting a shot. With a safe, incremental approach, you’ll begin to feel a lot like Wonder Woman in the last movie when she walks across no-man’s-land.

Speaking of that movie, here’s what Gal Gadot, who played Wonder Woman, told Glamour magazine about gaining seventeen pounds of muscle after strength training for the role: “I feel so much better now. When you feel strong, it changes everything—your posture, the way you walk. I look at photos from five years ago and think, whoa, I was too skinny. It’s not cool.” Wonder Woman, I couldn’t have said it better.

Spending time, energy, and sometimes money to cultivate better posture is an investment well worth making. Regardless of your height, you will be stunned at how differently you feel, and how differently you’re treated. Never let your posture tell a story you don’t want it to . . . or make you look like that creepy guy from The Rocky Horror Picture Show. In the immortal words of my hero Dr. Maya Angelou, “Stand up straight and realize who you are. That you tower over your circumstances.”